This season has been hard – good, but hard. I shared that with a mentor yesterday when she asked how my relationship with God has been lately. So much has been going on and so much is constantly circling in my mind. There is so much to process and prepare for and so many emotions experienced. It’s as if there’s not any space left in my mind for relationship with God – to lay it all aside to welcome the presence of the Spirit. I know I have it all backwards – the only way I will find peace and rest is to lay it all aside, at Jesus’ feet, and be still in His presence. We all deal with this at times, it’s hard.
I did this in high school when I was dealing with depression and didn’t feel God in my life: I relied on knowledge of God when I couldn’t rely on any other part of my relationship with Him or emotions/feeling Him. Since committing to the Race, I’ve been working through and studying the Gospels. Learning about Jesus’ ministry is so beautiful. Growing up in the church, hearing these stories, I think I became desensitized to the sermons he preached, the miracles he performed, and the way he lived his life with his disciples. Not only that, but desensitized to the fact that we literally have a collection of stories and sermons and miracles and testimonies right in our hands! How kind of God!
Over and over as I’ve studied the Gospels, I’ve read the Lord’s Prayer – Jesus’ Prayer! What a gift he gave his disciples and to us – to be taught to pray a prayer that Jesus spoke from his own lips. We are taught in Scripture to not rely on the heart or emotions for they are deceitful and lie, so we cannot stop praying or communicating with God when we don’t feel him. (Easier said than done.) That’s what is so nice about the prayer Jesus taught us to pray – he tells us exactly what to say: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven out debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. (Matthew 6: 9-13 ESV) Before Jesus says that, he tells those listening to pray alone in a quiet place, and he also tells them not to use empty phrases and all these words “for your Father knows what you need before you ask him” (v. 8). Sometimes we feel this pressure with prayer, as if it’s a test or proves our devotedness or “Christianness,” but the way Jesus teaches us to pray takes away the pressure to perform or get it right or even say all the things we need to say. The Lord’s Prayer is about the words Jesus gives us to say, but it’s also about our heart posture.
What a gift to be taught by Jesus and for our hearts to be seen by God!
It is now just 9 days until I leave…. Please pray this prayer with me and pray for me as I prepare physically, emotionally, and spiritually for this mission God has placed on my heart.
Emily, You are a blessing to those you are going to serve and a blessing to us here at home. I pray for GOD’s protection around you during this trip. To God be the glory!